Do you manage or master?

The whole time management thing is a myth. I busted it.

Same goes for managing life. Busted.

Managing is for people who want to barely get by. It's for people who feel stuck and want to stay stuck, even when they protest otherwise. It's for people who tread water and keep their face barely above the surface. It's for people who make bold claims about who they are to convince everyone, including themselves. Managing is frenzy, manic, exhausted, confused, overwhelmed, frustrated and irritable. It's bare minimum.

Managing doesn't work for me. I've tried it. For many years. Actually, I was doing it right up until my self-imposed sabbatical that started in May. That blog post is coming next week. Or should I write about integrity instead? I can't choose. Vote here and help me.

One of the many things I determined whilst on my self-imposed sabbatical was how long I'd been managing my life. Yes, it was going ok. Yes, I was moderately successful. Yes, I was doing much better compared to many other people, in fact. But I was also experiencing too many days, weeks and months of this low-grade bummed out feeling that I couldn't shake. I tried to do all these things to change that feeling and realized I was feeding the same monster: my own conditioning to manage instead of master.

So, I began to practice mastering my life. Mastering my time. Mastering my communication. Mastering my energy. Mastering my money, Mastering my choices. Mastering my exercise, food, spirituality and career plans. Mastering my MIND, most especially.

Wow. That did it.

Moving from a mindset of managing to mastering takes intention and some time because the managing habits are SO STRONG. God, I've been reinforcing those habits for my whole life.

This mastering thing requires me to really hone in on what I've been doing well and taking it to the next level. It helps me feel the way I wanted to be feeling the whole time I was treading water thinking I was doing it "right". 

How mastery feels

You know that feeling when you walk out onto the beach for the first time in a long time? Where you focus on the waves and smell that air and you sort of feel your body connect with all that energy? For a few moments you forget everything about your life and you just see that horizon and sky and water and smell the salt and that's all there is. 

That's how we are meant to feel. We can find it and make it a real thing, every day. I didn't used to think so, but I'm doing it and it's pretty awesome. It took a major mind shift that I probably wouldn't have been able to make without all the work I've done up to this point AND the time and space I created to breathe a bit. 


Mastering works better than managing. Mastering puts you in the driver's seat with a relaxed but confident grip on the wheel. It isn't about controlling (that's managing). It's about moving from aspiration to action, putting intentions into practice and moving with everything as it comes.

Sit with this today and see how it feels. Which are you doing right now? Managing or mastering?

Limiting Beliefs-Stop Being Selfish

Stop. Stop whatever you're doing. Typing, calling someone, txting, chatting on gchat, knitting, etc.

Rest your hands on your lap. Focus on this screen. Only read this. Don't go anywhere else in your head.

What are you thinking in this very moment? What are the thoughts in your head?

We are our thoughts. I've heard this said to me at least 20,000 times in the last few years and still I find myself coming back and having to remember it. I am a health coach but I'm first and foremost a human being. I get tricked and seduced into negative, nagging and limiting thoughts and beliefs at every turn in my life---in some places more than others. The reason I'm a good coach is because I share the same struggles my clients face, either in my past or in my present life.

Here's an exercise. READ THESE QUESTIONS:

What do you want to do with your time every day? What impact do you want to have? What do you want in a partner? What time do you want to achieve for that marathon you're running? What is your ideal living situation? What would your life look like if you were doing what you truly love and were born to do everyday and making all the money you needed at the same time? What would it feel like to have all the love and abundance you want and need?

I want you to write down 3 thoughts you have that are currently limiting your potential to do right by yourself and live the life you were made for. Write down 3 thoughts that came up as soon as you read those questions above: 1) 2) 3)

AH HA! See! Those thoughts are what are keeping you where you are. If you're not doing exactly what you want to be doing in this very moment, or having everything you want to have, or experiencing life the way you want to be it's because of these thoughts. These "constructed glass ceilings*".

the sky is really and truly the limit for all of us! (except pilots, parasailers, birds, bugs, clouds and astronauts. they have a different limit.)

I say this with all the love in my heart and the mindfulness of someone living a life outside the "norms of society" and aware of my own privileges within my situation. I have a lot of experience training people to be conscious of the "isms" that mold our society AND I have clients who have shown me that they and they alone are responsible for their own health and happiness, no matter their identity or past life experience.

I had a good friend and mentor say this to me on the phone today: "Remember to not be selfish. A lot of people need your help and you're depriving so many people of your gifts by wasting your time [insert ways I'm wasting my time]."

It was exactly what I needed to hear. I AM wasting my time in many ways--the question is WHY?

The answer: limiting beliefs.

Stop being selfish. Identify your own limiting beliefs, take action steps and get out there and share your gifts in the ways that YOU want and need. As soon as a thought comes up to dissuade you, remember it's a limiting belief and it's not the truth. Truth is what feels good, warm and right. It can feel scary but as my mentor Joshua Rosenthal says: Fear and excitement feel the same way in the body.

Do you feel scared or excited? How can you tell the difference? By what you're attaching to it.

If you're attaching limiting beliefs, it feels like fear.

If you're attaching TRUTH and LOVE, it feels exciting!

Stop limiting yourself. Stop being selfish.


Eat. Love. Live Better. Savor Your Existence!

How to Make Time Like Magic

I sat down recently and took note of how many times in the past month or so I said, "I don't have the time for..." and realized, wow. I was really making life difficult.

I was limiting my own power and potential.

Why was I doing this? How was I doing it?

Well, I needed more time. I needed it to accomplish things like seeing friends, returning phone calls and getting much needed work done to stabilize and build my business. I needed this time to move forward with my personal and professional goals. I had identified what needed changing but I still felt like a hamster on a wheel.

I kept saying I needed change. But I wasn't doing anything different to bring that change about.

So recently, I changed my schedule. I set the intention to create more time for myself AND create a master schedule so I can make more efficient use of the time I do have. Funnily enough, as always, one of my clients said the same thing in his session--without even knowing that I was doing that for myself.

He said, "I need to make a master schedule so I know what I'm accomplishing".

Funny, eh?

One small step can make such a huge difference in our lives. In fact, small steps or changes actually are ideal because they don't bring a tidal wave of change to manage.

Try to find one area of your life that needs tweaking and identify one small thing you can do to change it. In addition to changing my schedule, I also began running a few times per week. I have an idea of how long I'd like to run (the recommended 30 mins, 4x/week is always in my head) but the goal is to get my shoes on and go. Whatever happens after that is awesome. Setting an intention, sticking to it, and giving myself the chance to acclimate is a positive transformation in my own head and my own attitude, which, ultimately, will show up in my whole life.

How many times can I make it happen this week?

What simple change can you make to your life and how will you hold yourself accountable